Sexuality and Spirituality

“Sexuality is completely natural. We should not ever condemn, fear or distort any of the beautiful and sacred properties of Nature” ~ Damien Carrion.

I spent many years suppressing my sexuality. As a young female, I was taught that sexual desires were not to be spoken about or acted upon. I felt huge shame when I started to have sexual impulses around 15 years old. I would get so angry that boys my age would be praised and venerated for having sex. My first sexual experience left me feeling empty and confused. Since I had grown up with ‘polite girl’ syndrome, I felt I wasn’t allowed to express or ask for what I liked sexually. Men came first both metaphorically and literally. My body was treated like an object rather than the beautiful, sensual and sensitive instrument it is.

I then suppressed my sexuality even more — I became a spiritual seeker. No, I didn’t become a free loving hippie. I became a solemn, strict and stringent seeker of truth. Most holy books I read declared, “sex is a sin”, “one must be celibate to achieve liberation” and “sexual desires are the root cause of suffering”. So, being the good little spiritual seeker I was, I decided not to entertain any desires or act upon them. But now I know what you resist persists.

I felt great shame and guilt in regards to my sexuality. It was only recently when seeing an ex-partner that I realised love cannot be suppressed. All the old feelings of love, sensuality and intimacy came back as quick as a light switch. Years of trying to annihilate, suppress and transcend my sexual desires was making me suffer. I now realise there is absolutely nothing wrong with sexual desires and impulses. It’s just that we think they are wrong.

For underneath all surface desires is our real desire — the desire to one with life. We have lost the most important intimacy of all; the intimacy with life moment-to-moment. This is the true love affair. And whether or not my sexuality is expressed with another human being… I am deeply in love with life. To me, this existence is a sensual experience — an explosion of love and light. So be true to you. Get in touch with your body. Ask for what you want. Explore, play and discover. Stop judging yourself. Be kind and gentle like a true lover.

Aimee xx

2 replies
  1. Graeme
    Graeme says:

    Ha, ha this reminds me of a great quote …

    “To hear many religious people talk, one would think God created the torso, head, legs and arms, but the devil slapped on the genitals.” – Don Schrader

    I love what you say. Sexuality is a beautiful part of the human experience, a merging into oneness, and there to be embraced.

    Reply
    • Aimee
      Aimee says:

      Oh I love that quote Graeme 🙂 ….. yes, yes, yes! A merging into oneness – the lover and the beloved. Where is God not and where does guilt exist apart from in the mind?!

      Reply

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