“I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life.” – Henry Thoreau
I can never decide whether to write a short polished bio or a long raw one. Too short seems insincere and too long feels like oversharing. So, I’ll share somewhere in between so you can get to know me and my journey!
As a young child I was sensitive, intuitive and deeply introspective. As early as I can remember, people told me, ‘You are too sensitive’ which made me feel like that there was something wrong with me. Even at preschool, I would sit on my favourite rock and ponder the bigger questions – Who am I? Why are we here? What is life? I had a dreamy imagination and spent many hours speaking to the ocean, staring up at the stars and talking to rocks and plants.
However, as I grew older, I shut down my openness and natural curiosity in an attempt to fit in. By my early teenage years, I hated myself. This self-hatred manifested as chronic perfectionism and self-harm. I felt as if there was a terrible black hole inside me and never felt good enough. I didn’t know who ‘Aimee’ was anymore, and by my early 20’s, I entered a dark period of substance abuse. This existential crisis led me down a destructive path where I nearly died.
After my near brush with death, I heard a deeper voice inside me, warning me that this was either a wakeup call to change or a death sentence if I kept living like this way. So, I packed my bags and travelled through Central and South America for a year. I lived with shamans in the Amazon, took mystical brews and visited sacred sites that took days to reach by foot. I saw, felt and experienced things that words cannot fully express. As my consciousness expanded, my world opened up again. I realised the extent to which I had been living in the nightmare realm of the inner critic. This trip got me back in touch with my true self which had been forgotten and neglected for so long.
When I returned home, I experienced another identity crisis. I was no longer the drug fuelled party girl, but I was also not yet ready to embrace my new expanded self. I joined a strict spiritual group in a determined quest to become enlightened. For 3 years, I meditated 4 to 5 hours a day, read countless metaphysical books and started giving talks around Sydney. But I knew this was not the true freedom I was seeking because in my striving to become spiritually perfect, I was denying my beautiful, messy humanness.
As I started to pull away from strict spirituality, I felt a joy return. The same joy I used to feel a child. In an exhilarating rush of insight, I realised that it is okay to be imperfect. Life is not about transcending ourselves and escaping the world through spiritual gymnastics. It’s about becoming whole by embracing every part of ourselves, even what feels unlovable and broken. It is through our cracks that the light shines in. And so, I wrote my first book ‘imperfect’ which shares my roller coaster journey from self-hatred to embracing my messy me-ness.
I’m currently a communication teacher for young women inspiring them to be a voice, not an echo, and I’m studying a Master of Counselling to become a psychotherapist. I’m also a curator for Wisdom Trove where I select and share powerful quotes from various books on spirituality and psychology.
In a nutshell, I’m a messy, imperfect human being learning to ride this wild journey called life!
Star sign: cancer
Interests: mysticism, big ideas and people watching
Recharge: moon, ocean and dance
Biggest joy: deep conversations, big ideas and coffee
Biggest fear: living an unlived life
Love/hate: technology and instruction manuals
Freaky party trick: twist both my hands 360 degree
Prized possession: my travel journals, Lemurian quartz
First job wanted: counsellor by day, DJ by night
Binge TV: documentaries on consciousness & near-death experiences
Last meal on earth: spaghetti bolognese, red wine and crème brule
Trip I want to take: Camino de Santiago
Struggle: perfectionism and letting go
Favourite word: celestial
Favourite movie: Brother Sun, Sister Moon
Favourite book: Leaves of Grass – Walt Whitman
Favourite music: classical, soul, hip-hop
Favourite poem: I Carry Your Heart with Me – e.e. cummings